The Most Popular Comedian

Advertisement

Wen Zhecheng’s forehead pressed against the door frame, the sharp edges made his forehead ache, stimulating his nerves to maintain a trace of sanity. He recalled the scene he had just seen on the official account—the bright stage lights reflected in Rong Yuheng’s clear and handsome eyes, filled with starry sparkles.

The latter’s rosy and tender lips softly pressed against the fair back of his hand, deforming and bouncing back to a plump shape. Skin met skin, and the kiss carried a wet and resonant sound, ambiguous and enticing.

Although the camera didn’t capture it very clearly, at the moment Rong Yuheng blew a kiss, the white wristband on his fair wrist was distinctly visible, the one he had put on him.

It seemed like a declaration to the world, hidden yet boldly proclaiming their love in such a daring and passionate manner.

Wen Zhecheng couldn’t take it anymore. Blood rushed to his brain instantly. His heart pounded wildly in his chest, compressed, expanded, and compressed again, as if it were about to explode.

Love and desire surged within him, eager to find a release, and he couldn’t wait for a single moment.

…

Hot breath hit the misty glass, creating a layer of moisture. Wen Zhecheng said, “Let me in, right now.”

“Why?” Rong Yuheng’s voice echoed in the bathroom, muffled. He took a small step back inside. Bubbles still hadn’t been washed off him, and he was slippery. “I haven’t finished showering.”

“I know.” Wen Zhecheng continued pressing against the door. “But I just want to come in now.”

Rong Yuheng hesitated for two seconds. “…You urgently need to pee?”

A moment of silence outside the door, followed by a heavy “clang” as the doorknob bore a forceful hit!

Advertisement

Wen Zhecheng gritted his teeth. “I’m not in a hurry to pee. I’m in a hurry for something else.”

Startled by the ferocious Wen, Rong Yuheng said, “No, no, I won’t open it!”

Wen Zhecheng calmed down, softly coaxing him. “I won’t do anything, let me in, okay?”

“Why do you want to come in?”

“Come in…” Wen Zhecheng swallowed the common lines of the domineering CEO trope. “Come in to see you.”

“…” Rong Yuheng suddenly felt like he was being visited in prison.

Turning back to the showerhead, he continued rinsing, placing Wen Zhecheng on hold. “Explain it clearly. If you don’t, I won’t let you in.”

Wen Zhecheng paused, then had to straightforwardly play the emotional card. “I saw the direct shot of the performance, Zi-zi… don’t you want to tease me to death?”

Advertisement

“Oh, you saw the live broadcast!” Rong Yuheng felt a bit smug. Ah, no wonder Wen Zhecheng was so excited; it seemed he hit the right spot!

“Hehehe~” Now that he had cleaned himself, Rong Yuheng put on his bathrobe and walked towards the door.

Clothes on, now he could cuddle with his owner.

Rong Yuheng’s hand pressed the doorknob and just as he was about to push it down, the bathroom door was forcefully pushed open—clang!

Startled, he quickly took a step back! A tall figure rushed into the doorway, heading straight for him. The next second, Rong Yuheng was enveloped in a large embrace.

“Wen Zhecheng!” He exclaimed.

Wen Zhecheng tightly wrapped his arms around him, burying his head in Rong Yuheng’s shoulder. The tall nose rubbed against his neck, slid up, and with warm breath, lips gently kissed away the water droplets on his cheek, then pecked lightly.

Rong Yuheng shivered all over…

Even though he was wearing a bathrobe, it was only a bathrobe! Right now, he felt his upper body was confined by Wen Zhecheng, unable to move, while the lower part was breezy.

Damn, this is thrilling!

Advertisement

“Let me go out and put on my clothes before you kiss, okay?” Rong Yuheng, covered in saliva, tried to negotiate with the fierce owner, struggling in the confined space.

“Okay.”

Wen Zhecheng held onto his waist, gently lifted him off the ground, and turned towards the bedroom outside the bathroom.

This posture made their connection very tight, and as they moved, Rong Yuheng felt Wen Zhecheng’s enthusiasm.

His heart trembled… Damn, this is way too, too damn passionate!

Wen Zhecheng, shameless as ever, put the person by the bed in this position and even leaned down for a couple of arches.

Rong Yuheng, “…”

Wen Zhecheng lowered his head to look at him, and the height difference allowed him to easily see the delightful scene beneath the loose neckline.

His little hamster, milky white, truly enticing.

Seeing Wen Zhecheng’s expression, as if he were about to indulge wantonly, Rong Yuheng licked his lips and rubbed his head against the bed. “Shall we… climb the mountain?”

As the saying goes, familiarity breeds boldness. He was now an experienced old driver in such matters.

Wen Zhecheng didn’t answer; instead, his gaze swept over him with a deep meaning and then pressed down directly.

The engine roared, handbrake gripped, and they headed up the mountain.

Rong Yuheng, freshly cleaned, his mind in a fog, felt that Wen Zhecheng’s driving skills had improved, and his teeth seemed sharper than before.

His face and neck hurt.

Advertisement

So, Rong Yuheng reciprocated by nibbling on Wen Zhecheng’s ear.

“Hmm,” the person above let out a muffled groan.

Proud of himself, Rong Yuheng licked his own little tiger teeth. My biting skills are quite sharp too.

The next second, Wen Zhecheng released the handbrake.

Rong Yuheng was taken aback, looking at him in confusion: … Revenge?

Wen Zhecheng pinched his waist, flipped him around, and covered him. Rong Yuheng quickly turned his head, pressing down on him. “No, no, can’t do this, it’ll hurt!”

Wen Zhecheng paused and then chuckled softly, “I have a gentle method that won’t hurt; do you want to try?”

“…?”

A few minutes later, the milky white little hamster scattered across the bed, terrified.

“This isn’t Mount Akina; I’ve never seen such a view!”

Wen Zhecheng quickly caught him and consoled him, “This is Mount Akina; it’s the back mountain you’ve never been to… The scenery is even better than the mountaintop, fascinating…”

Rong Yuheng was almost resorting to fisticuffs—this road is too steep; he’s afraid he can’t handle it!

Wen Zhecheng continued to coax him, “Look, I told you the view from the mountaintop is good; did I lie to you? The happiness has truly doubled, hasn’t it? Trust me this time; the scenery in the back mountain is really beautiful.”

Softened by Wen Zhecheng’s words, Rong Yuheng stopped resisting. Moreover, Wen Zhecheng was skilled at painting rainbows, making him feel comfortable all over.

“So… should we give it a try? But I can demand to get off at any time.”

“Of course, of course…” Wen Zhecheng had a look that said “you’re in charge,” and he began gently testing the road leading to the back mountain…

At first, it was okay. Wen Zhecheng was very gentle and polite, asking him as they walked, “How’s the road? Not too steep, right?”

Rong Yuheng grumbled, “It’s okay.”

But halfway through, he began to feel uncomfortable. The further they went, the narrower the road became. Rong Yuheng nudged Wen Zhecheng, “I think this is about enough, isn’t it?”

Wen Zhecheng was sweating; he was already driving very slowly, afraid that Yuheng would get motion sickness.

“Perseverance is victory; let’s go a bit further?”

Rong Yuheng even detected a hint of inspirational speech in his words! It was absurd.

He was about to correct Wen Zhecheng’s language when he suddenly felt a drop of sweat fall on his shoulder, and the temperature was hot enough to make him involuntarily shudder.

…It seemed Wen Zhecheng was also having a hard time.

After realizing this, Rong Yuheng shamefully softened. Both of them had been drivers; he could understand that feeling. Although he was a bit scared, he couldn’t bear to just drive Wen Zhecheng down the mountain like this.

Rong Yuheng adjusted his position a bit and sent himself towards Wen Zhecheng.

The person behind him paused in his breath, and then suddenly increased the speed! Rong Yuheng was almost lifted off the seat.

“Hiss—!” He dodged to the side, but was pulled back by the arm.

Wen Zhecheng’s strength was gentle but unyielding.

Rong Yuheng struggled twice but couldn’t break free, whimpering as he bit the pillow and returned to the mountain road.

The two didn’t know how long they slowly moved along the road. Suddenly, Wen Zhecheng found a beautiful spot. He gestured Rong Yuheng towards it, and in almost an instant, the latter shivered violently!

Wen Zhecheng’s eyes lit up; it turned out to be here.

“Zi-zi, how about here?”

Rong Yuheng was utterly astonished! His face turned crimson, and he hugged a small pillow, trembling—no one had ever told him that there were such views in the back mountain!

Seeing him like that, Wen Zhecheng knew he liked it. He became even more enthusiastic, slowly unfolding this beautiful scroll… a more beautiful scenery than Mount Akina’s mountaintop finally revealed itself before the two.

Sweet spring water moisturized the ravines, saturating the ground beneath their feet with softness.

Wen Zhecheng buried himself in the hamster’s fur, took a deep breath, and then pressed forward.

Rong Yuheng felt it. He instinctively wanted to surge forward but forcibly held back, staying in place without resistance.

Because it was Wen Zhecheng.

Sweat dripped from Rong Yuheng’s forehead, landing on the pillow, forming dark watermarks. Suddenly, all those seemingly casual dates, scripted performances, and meticulously arranged excuses that Wen Zhecheng had made in the past became vividly clear in his mind—

Every seemingly coincidental date, every script for a cooperative performance, every carefully arranged excuse—everywhere had traces deliberately created by Wen Zhecheng.

He should have noticed it earlier.

In this world, no one would be so bored as to spend a lot of time with you. All those so-called coincidences, connections, and intersections were just the result of one person’s “deliberate efforts” and willingness.

When Wen Zhecheng barged in, Rong Yuheng cried. Not because of pain, but because he felt a brewing emotion.

Wen Zhecheng was just too gentle, making him feel loved.

He was willing to give because Wen Zhecheng’s goodness deserved it.

…

Wen Zhecheng cultivated the back mountain for a while, gradually increasing the speed of the car.

He was now descending quickly.

However, Rong Yuheng gradually found it hard to endure. He lay on the quilt, listening to the engine’s loud hum, the high-frequency vibrations of the engine shaking his legs and feet, making them sore and numb.

He gradually shrank down, tears welling up in his eyes. “Can you end it faster?”

Wen Zhecheng hesitated, then lifted him back up to the driver’s seat. “Not yet, baby.”

Rong Yuheng grunted, feeling tears about to fall. Calling him “baby” didn’t work; his brother was right—these were all a man’s sweet words!

And what about not breaking the skin? The skin wasn’t broken, but the extreme pleasure and pain mixed together were simply unbearable.

“I really don’t want to… um, isn’t it almost enough?”

“There’s still a broader view ahead. Since we’ve come all this way…”

“Shut up! Sob, sob, sob…”

“Alright, I won’t say anything.” Wen Zhecheng really stopped talking and continued to concentrate on the important task.

After a while, Rong Yuheng regretted it. He cried and said, “How about… um, shall we continue chatting for a while?”

Wen Zhecheng slapped him with a “pop,” not painful but causing a stronger stimulation.

Rong Yuheng completely softened into a hamster pancake, still tearful. He lay in a pile, whimpering and crying, occasionally interjecting scolding.

…

Wen Zhecheng couldn’t bear it. His little baby was quite good at turning the tables; he did remember every old account.

“Do you remember when I asked you for a reward?” Wen Zhecheng murmured in his ear. “What did you give me then?”

Rong Yuheng, who had no mood to recall these things, choked, “What…?”

Wen Zhecheng said, “Pop, pop, pop, pop.”

Rong Yuheng, “… Sob, sob, sob.”

Wen Zhecheng pinched him again, not painful but causing an even stronger reaction.

“Still excited now?” Wen Zhecheng asked.

Rong Yuheng, “… Sob, sob, sob, sob!!!”

Wen Zhecheng continued to bring up old accounts. With each one, Rong Yuheng’s crying became more intense. He even suspected that Wen Zhecheng had a cloud note in his brain that could instantly retrieve records.

By the end, Rong Yuheng cried so much that snot bubbles were about to emerge. He had been lifted up by Wen Zhecheng countless times and then fell back down, all soft and flaccid.

Rong Yuheng let out a loud sob, “Stop talking about it, please stop…”

“What shouldn’t I mention?” 

“The old accounts and the waist… don’t mention them…”

“Okay,” Wen Zhecheng said, then stopped moving.

Rong Yuheng’s crying suddenly stopped. Was his gentle feeder finally unable to continue?

Before he could rejoice and turn his tears into laughter, Wen Zhecheng’s hand covered him. The scorching palm made him shudder, and a sense of impending danger surfaced in his heart.

“Well, get up by yourself then.”

Rong Yuheng widened his eyes in disbelief—get up by himself?!

His tears and runny nose smeared the bedding, making him look pitiful. “How am I supposed to get up…?”

Wen Zhecheng supported him and lightly pinched him, coaxing, “Lift up a bit, can you do that?”

Author’s note: Rong Yuheng: Sob, sob, sob…

Ps. Afraid of being shut down, tried my best. Had to retype it after losing the draft [foaming at the mouth]

Please everyone, quietly climb the mountain, watch the scenery without making a sound… Let’s keep the comment section calm and pretend like nothing happened.