The Most Popular Comedian

Advertisement

After Rong Yuheng had finished complaining, he still hadn’t realized that the air in the small dining room had become stagnant. Wen Zhecheng lowered his eyes, gazing at him with a deep and mysterious look…

“Is your butt not perky enough?” Wen Zhecheng’s hand slid down Rong Yuheng’s back collar, grabbing hold of his neck, and his thumb lightly caressed the side of his neck, carrying a suggestive undertone

“This drunkard speaks the truth; it’s quite surprising,” 

Rong Yuheng only heard the word “surprising” and responded with a half-smile, narrowing his eyes at Wen Zhecheng, saying, “Hehehe, I can still create more little surprises for my master~”

“…” Wen Zhecheng choked back a response.

He lifted Rong Yuheng off the dining table, and Rong Yuheng, all soft and floppy like a block of jelly, clung to him, burying his head in the crook of Wen Zhecheng’s shoulder and nuzzling back and forth.

Wen Zhecheng’s throat tightened as he placed his hand on Rong Yuheng’s lower back, where the curve had just the right depth for a hand to grip.

Wen Zhecheng thought of when they were acting in “Plain Robes,” with Rong Yuheng’s ample outer robe concealing this particular waistline. The cinched waist created a beautiful curve.

He had wanted to embrace him in their costumes for a long time.

He thought of this and couldn’t help but press Rong Yuheng closer to himself, lowering his head until his lips were almost touching Rong Yuheng’s earlobe. “Darling, when should we do some role-playing in ancient costumes?”

Rong Yuheng’s spirits immediately lifted. “Role-playing in ancient costumes? I can do it right now!” After saying this, he pushed Wen Zhecheng away and waved his hand dramatically. “Xiao Zhe, quickly prepare the bath and change of clothes for me—”

“…” Wen Zhecheng’s fantasy was instantly shattered.

Advertisement

He couldn’t do this kind of role-play.

—

He pushed the drunken squirrel, who was spouting nonsense, into the bedroom and closed the door behind him.

“Click.” The room fell silent for two seconds. Although Rong Yuheng was drunk, his animal instincts made him feel a hint of danger.

He clung to Wen Zhecheng, turning his head to look at the bedroom door. “Why did you lock it…?”

Wen Zhecheng’s dry lips twitched as he said, “Privacy.”

Rong Yuheng was puzzled. “What kind of privacy?”

Wen Zhecheng looked at him meaningfully. “A luxurious Lincoln limousine.”

Advertisement

Upon hearing this, Rong Yuheng, quite subjectively, opened a new channel in his mind. “Are you changing careers?”

He then leaned in with joy, as if he had discovered his own value. “If you’re entering the automotive industry, I have some connections who can help you~”

Wen Zhecheng’s lips curled slightly. “I’m not…”

Rong Yuheng interrupted him with an “Oh,” as if he had suddenly realized something. “Aren’t you planning to do blind massages? You have quite a wide range of interests! Haha~”

Wen Zhecheng almost couldn’t figure out where the reference to “massage” had come from. He pondered for quite a while before recalling a certain incident that had happened after a competition.

Immediately after, he fell into silence… Why did Rong Yuheng’s memories become so ancient when he was drunk?

Furthermore, where did the “blind” setting come from?

By now, it was getting late, and Wen Zhecheng couldn’t find the words for a moment. He urged Rong Yuheng to take a shower.

“I’ve brought your change of clothes inside. Do you want to use the showerhead or the bathtub?”

Rong Yuheng tilted his head. “A real man uses what, a showerhead? I want to use the bathtub, for a bubble bath!”

Advertisement

Wen Zhecheng almost wanted to applaud him silently. “You’re truly manly.”

…

Wen Zhecheng pushed the confused hamster into the bathroom and rolleup his sleeves to fill the bathtub with water. “Are you going to wash yourself, or should I help you?”

He actually wanted to help, even though it was hard to predict what might happen next given Rong Yuheng’s condition. But the joy of grooming the hamster wouldn’t diminish because of that.

Rong Yuheng leaned against the wall, watching Wen Zhecheng fill the bath. The rising steam gradually enveloped the bathtub, and the heat could be felt even a meter away.

He smacked his lips. “No, I’ll do it myself.”

Wen Zhecheng’s movement of testing the water temperature hesitated slightly, and then he whispered, “Let me help you. What if you slip?”

Rong Yuheng joyfully sang, “I won’t die, la la la~”

Wen Zhecheng… was ushered out of the bathroom by Rong Yuheng’s cheerful singing. The sound of the door closing, “clank,” sounded cold and heartless in the quiet room.

The sound of water emanated from the bathroom behind him, mixed with Rong Yuheng’s tune of “la la la,” shattering Wen Zhecheng’s final traces of fanciful thoughts.

Rong Yuheng’s “bubble bath” lasted for an hour, and when he came out, Wen Zhecheng was almost falling asleep against the head of the bed.

Wen Zhecheng had had an exhausting day. As he half-closed his eyes, his mind automatically replayed the events of the day, like a life’s slideshow:

He had gotten up early to steam buns, then driven for two hours to deliver them to G City. After that, he had a busy day of work. He then drove back to C City and, upon arriving home, changed clothes, rolled up his sleeves, and started cooking.

By the time they sat down to eat, Wen Zhecheng had to pour wine for two ancestral spirits and admire their grandiose song and dance performance… It wasn’t until the two spirits had taken a break one after the other that Wen Zhecheng could finally catch his breath.

So when Rong Yuheng refused his “grooming” offer, he didn’t insist. One reason was that Rong Yuheng was still drunk, and the other was that he was indeed feeling a bit overwhelmed…

Advertisement

When Rong Yuheng emerged from the bathroom, he saw Wen Zhecheng looking exhausted as he leaned on the bed.

In fact, Rong Yuheng had sobered up halfway after his shower. Although his awareness was still a bit hazy, he at least knew what he was doing.

Of course, he also remembered very clearly what he had done before.

Rong Yuheng sheepishly approached and poked his owner. “I’m done with my shower.”

Wen Zhecheng responded with a soft “Hmm,” not yet realizing that his hamster’s senses were gradually returning. He raised his hand to rub Rong Yuheng’s face for a moment. “You can go to sleep first; I’ll take a shower.”

Rong Yuheng pondered for a few seconds. “Do you want me to help you shower?”

That immediately woke Wen Zhecheng up.

He looked at Rong Yuheng, his gaze narrowing slightly. “…How do you want to help me shower?”

Rong Yuheng tentatively suggested, “With a real man’s bubble bath?”

“…” After a two-second pause, Wen Zhecheng’s eyes closed again, and his brow gradually furrowed. “No need. I’ll use the ordinary showerhead to wash myself.”

“…”

Wen Zhecheng’s shower was much quicker than Rong Yuheng’s, taking just over twenty minutes. When he came out of the bathroom, Rong Yuheng was lying on the bed, half-asleep and in a dreamy state.

Wen Zhecheng went over and tucked him in, and Rong Yuheng’s eyes opened slightly. “Are you done showering?”

Wen Zhecheng responded with a “Hmm.” “Did I wake you up? Go back to sleep.”

Rong Yuheng scooted over in the bed, making room for Wen Zhecheng. “Then you can join me later.”

Wen Zhecheng was briefly taken aback. “I’ll just…”

He stopped mid-sentence.

He had initially thought of saying that he would sleep on the floor, but then he realized—wait a minute, they were in a relationship, so why sleep separately? Moreover, Rong Yuheng was sober now, and when he suggested they sleep together, it seemed genuine.

Rubbing his eyes, Rong Yuheng asked him, “What about you?”

Wen Zhecheng’s mouth opened briefly, then he softly sang, “I’m still the same young man as before, without a trace of change~”

Rong Yuheng’s motion of rubbing his eyes abruptly stopped. After a moment, he said with a complicated expression, “You’ve changed quite a bit.”

Wen Zhecheng replied, “…”

Soon, they were lying side by side on the bed. Wen Zhecheng reached out and turned off the bedside lamp with a “click,” plunging the bedroom into darkness.

This was their first time sharing a bed in a normal state. Wen Zhecheng had imagined countless times what it would be like to embrace Rong Yuheng in the same bed. He had even worried that he might not be able to control himself and scare his little hamster.

However, the reality was that both of them were too tired to do anything. Their exhaustion equaled that “not able to do anything.”

To prevent Rong Yuheng from falling off the bed again, Wen Zhecheng deliberately squeezed him to the inner side of the bed and put his arm around him. “Goodnight, little one.”

Rong Yuheng nuzzled into Wen Zhecheng’s embrace and mumbled, “Owner, you’ve bent…”

Wen Zhecheng, in a half-asleep state, thought to himself: Well, isn’t that the whole point?

…

It was three in the morning, and the night was quiet. Suddenly, Rong Yuheng on the bed moved.

He wrapped himself in the blanket and slowly moved toward the foot of the bed, pulling the covers away from Wen Zhecheng’s body.

At this moment, Wen Zhecheng was still dreaming. In his dream, he was at Rong Yuheng’s place, cleaning the air conditioner and drying quilts. Suddenly, the sky outside darkened, and a cold wind blew, making Wen Zhecheng shiver.

Before he could go back inside to escape the cold, a hot air balloon floated toward the balcony. Rong Yuheng sat on the hot air balloon, waving to him. “Darling, come on a world tour with Mama!”

Then, a little hamster suddenly darted out from under Wen Zhecheng’s feet with a “whoosh” and hopped onto the hot air balloon, even wiggling its round bottom at Wen Zhecheng.

Wen Zhecheng panicked and ignored the cold, hastily chasing after it. “Rongrong, don’t go!”

The little hamster on the hot air balloon shook its fur on its bottom and said, “Your bottom isn’t perky enough! I want to travel the world with Mama and find a real man with a perky bottom!”

In just a few sentences, the hot air balloon had drifted farther and farther away.

Wen Zhecheng turned and ran downstairs, getting into his Lexus RX and chasing after the hot air balloon. While driving, he stuck his head out the car window and shouted at the balloon in the sky, “Rongrong, I can train myself! Can you slow down a bit?”

Rong Yuheng clung to the hot air balloon and offered a warm reminder, “Owner, you won’t catch up with a hot air balloon in your Lexus RX. Do you want me to introduce you to some friends in the car business? Maybe you should get a luxurious extended Lincoln?”

…

Swish! Wen Zhecheng woke up in an instant.

When he woke up, there was a hint of daylight streaming through the window, likely around six or seven in the morning. Wen Zhecheng turned his head and saw that most of the blanket had been pulled away from him, and the culprit was hanging at the end of the bed like a chrysalis.

Wen Zhecheng thought to himself, “No wonder it’s so cold.”

He sat up, pulled the nearly falling “chrysalis” back onto the bed, and decided to get up to steam some buns.

–

Rong Yuheng woke up when it was already bright outside. He checked the time – 8:40. Half of the bed next to him was empty. He quickly got up, freshened up, and pushed the door open.

As he stepped out, he happened to see Wen Zhongyun coming out of the adjacent room, yawning. Although both of these men had an inexpressible dislike for alcohol, their memory was equally good, and they remembered every detail of last night’s drunken escapade.

Rong Yuheng shyly cupped his face and said, “Uncle, good morning…”

Wen Zhongyun was equally bashful, “Oh, good morning…”

The two of them walked into the kitchen together, and they saw Wen Zhecheng with his back to the door, steaming buns for them. The dim morning light filtered through the window, casting a warm glow on his broad and sturdy figure.

Wen Zhongyun took the opportunity to whisper to Rong Yuheng, “Zhecheng is practical, simple, and knows how to live. He doesn’t like all those fancy things and doesn’t compete with anyone. Once you spend more time with him, you’ll realize he’s great at handling everyday life!”

Rong Yuheng nodded vigorously, as if pounding garlic. “I know, I know~”

Wen Zhongyun affectionately ruffled Rong Yuheng’s head fur.

Wen Zhecheng had finished steaming the buns and placed them on the table. He beckoned to the two at the door to sit down. “Up already? Any headaches?”

Both the older and younger men, who considered themselves responsible for Wen Zhecheng’s hangover, quickly shook their heads. “No, no…”

Wen Zhecheng said, “That’s good, then.”

The three of them began eating the buns in silence. Suddenly, Wen Zhecheng spoke up, “Rongrong, you mentioned yesterday that you have friends in the car business?”

Rong Yuheng raised his head. “Yes, what’s the matter?”

Wen Zhecheng’s mind was filled with the nightmares of the previous night. Hearing this, he put down his bun and said seriously, “I want to change my car.”

Both Rong Yuheng and Wen Zhongyun were taken aback.

Rong Yuheng asked in confusion, “What kind of car do you want to change?”

To cover up his inner turmoil, Wen Zhecheng immediately put on a pretentious air. “I want to get a luxurious extended Lincoln!”

Wen Zhongyun and Rong Yuheng exchanged glances.

Wen Zhongyun’s words from five minutes ago seemed to echo in their ears: “Zhecheng is practical, simple, and knows how to live. He doesn’t like all those fancy things and doesn’t compete with anyone. Once you spend more time with him, you’ll realize he’s great at handling everyday life!”

Author’s Note:

Wen Zhecheng (trembling): What kind of nightmare is this!

Rong Yuheng (shaking his head): Owner is definitely not the same as before.